If a public charity may legally decide to fund – or stop funding – another 501(c)3 at any time, why did the clash between the Susan G. Komen Foundation and Planned Parenthood gain such widespread publicity? It likely would have made news anyway since the subject matter is one on which there are deeply held views that span the ideological spectrum. In addition, these are two well-known nonprofits and the 'viral' nature of our communication networks enabled the Komen decision to spread like wildfire.

But another powerful element ignited this issue as well: political timing. We are, after all, in an election year. Candidates from all parties, keen to underscore distinctions, have been trying to garner support by emphasizing ideological differences. The result? Fiery and explosive assertions about a subject that I erroneously thought had become normative policy: women's right to access contraception coverage. My friends in Africa and Australia are asking me if this debate is authentic or just part of the rough and tumble politics of a presidential race. I assured them that these culture wars are about much more than an election.  More precisely, elections may have exacerbated them -- sped them to the forefront of print and electronic media -- but they are serious arguments put forth by people with ardent, passionate views. In America today, there are profound differences on topics like this one as well as gay marriage, access to abortion, and others.

I'm not a constitutional scholar, but as a citizen and community leader, I believe the heart of these debates is a fundamental question of whose rights are being protected and whose rights are being trampled. On one hand, some are wary of government over reaching its authority in ways that violate personal beliefs and religious liberties. From the types of guns permitted to health insurance coverage, the mandate of government, they say, infringes on their liberties. On the other hand, some believe government has an obligation to protect basic liberties and individual rights, especially hard-fought battles won through the legislative process and protected by the constitution.   

These cultural debates may intensify as the elections draw nearer, but they will not fade away anytime soon. How they are ultimately settled will depend on responses, however vast and varied, from communities across the country and how persuasively they convey their views to elected leaders. As members of the nonprofit and philanthropic sector, we hold a trusted place in neighborhoods everywhere. In many cases, our organizations provide a safe and special meeting ground in community life. In these sacred spaces, might we not invite our stakeholders to share their thoughts?

We may not agree on the proper role of government, but we will surely have a better understanding of what our neighbors believe and why they think the way they do. Our diversity has made America strong, resilient, and a more vibrant democracy.  The appreciation of those very differences has helped me respect others even when I do not share their views, a point well illustrated by an experience from years ago.

I remember tossing my hands in the air out of frustration and realizing that I simply could not understand those opposed to supporting the needs of immigrants soon to become US citizens. As an immigrant myself, I had always appreciated America's rich history of welcoming millions who had left loved ones behind and traveled thousands of miles, often in dangerous conditions. Those arriving in New York harbor (near where I worked at the time) were greeted by Emma Lazarus' profound words, "Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free."  Our first impression of the U.S: the Statue of Liberty, a torch held high in her right hand guiding us safely to a new life.

I couldn’t grasp how a nation of immigrants could produce citizens who did not believe in programs designed to help them transition to life here. I decided to talk to a pro-immigrant staff member of a Congressman who held that point of view. He too believed that our country should welcome "the homeless, the tempest-tost" but felt our commitment ended there. Grounded by a stalwart belief in self-reliance and personal responsibility, he worried that providing government assistance to legal immigrants could result in a smaller number of people being allowed to enter the US. In other words, spending fewer public resources might equate to a greater number of people entering the country. Our differences did not melt away, but we were able to find more common ground than either of us had anticipated.

That discussion happened about 15 years ago. Since then we have each moved on, though I had a chance to catch up with him a couple of weeks ago when he was in town. We talked about the battle over contraception and the fact that he wished the Komen Foundation had not reversed its decision!

Will you initiate a discussion with someone whose views are different than your own?

I know you are busy – but I’m also guessing that you care deeply about the deleterious effects of today’s cultural wars. What if each of us reached out to someone who holds a different point of view? What if we framed the discussion as a chance to understand each other better? And what if we agreed beforehand that this was not opportunity to change each other’s mind, but to listen without judging or criticizing?

If you need more convincing, watch Elizabeth Lesser’s TED talk. She’s the co-founder of Omega Institute, a nonprofit committed to promoting diverse educational experiences. In her talk, Elizabeth shares what she learned (as a self-defined "activist from the left") after meeting with a member of the Tea Party. She too is calling for people from different sides of the ideological spectrum to try to see the world, even for a moment, through the eyes of another.

If you do reach out, please share your experience with me via email at Diana@independentsector.org. Through civil, rational dialogue we can spark new conversations that spread from person to person in ways that honor our diverse perspectives, uncover new common ground, and maybe even help us find a shared purpose.